What was your first impression?

"Everything you need to know about having your second child" announces
the front cover, over a cartoon of an older child struggling to carry around
a baby. The book looks down to earth, practical and as if it will be funny
in places too.

What's it about?

This book covers every aspect of the transition from one child to two. It
covers questions such as "How will a second pregnancy be different?"
"How can I prepare the eldest for the new baby's arrival?" "How
can I help them to be friends as they grow up?" as well as looking at issues
such as how your marriage and working life might be changed. Perhaps most
importantly she looks at ways to stop yourself being overwhelmed and swallowed
up by the demands of being "Mummy" She also throws out some
challenges to employers and politicians as to how they could make employment
a whole lot more family friendly. The book is based on a number of sources
of research as well as interviews and the author's personal experiences. She
covers not just when your second child is a baby, but continuing adaptations
and changes through the child's first few years.

What did you like about it?

The author never assumes that things will be or should be the same for all
her readers. She covers a range of reactions and experiences. She
doesn't shy away from awkward and taboo subjects, such as what if you find that
you feel much more love for one of your children than the other.

What didn't you like?

I'm a "bad news" type of person - I like to know the worst that
things might get, because then I feel that I'll be prepared for it. Abrams
doesn't flinch away from saying how hard the first year can be, with two pre-schoolers.
I found that helpful, but I do know that some people find her book a little
bleak in places. And if you have older siblings, there isn't much for
you here. Abrams' own children were 6 and 3 at the time of writing, and
that's about as far as the book goes.

What will you still remember a year from now?

The first year of her second child's life is when a woman is most susceptible
to depression and stress, according to research. It's going to get better
from here on in, guys!

Who would you recommend this book to?

Anyone daunted by the imminent birth of their second child, or struggling
through the early months. Anyone with slightly older children who are
struggling to help them get on together.

Can you give us a couple of good quotes from the book?

"Despite the fact that most women who have one child will go on to have
another, the books, the research, the magazine articles, the advertisements
all carry on as if one child is the norm, while the norm - two children - is
treated as an anomaly barely worth mentioning.

As if loving two children weren't enough to keep most of us fully occupied
for the first year or two, there is also the not-so-small business of getting
them both through the day. Having a second child is like trading the horse-and-cart
you'd just mastered for an unruly coach-and-pair."

"Our children, we fondly assume, will be each other's playmates. And
it's true, they will be - eventually. But in the first year or two after
your second child is born the only game they'll play on a truly regular basis
is an infant version of badminton with you as the shuttlecock."