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Desperate for 17 month old to stop b/feeding


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#1 shelley

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 01:11 PM

Please help me! I have enjoyed breastfeeding my DD since the day she was born but recently I have started to loath it I've managed to stop apart from nap time and bedtime and when she wakes during the night. Since becoming pregnant again I cannot bear her near my boobs it is like fingernails down a chalk board it sets my teeth on edge I just want to push her away.
She doesn't even drink the milk now she just does a suckling thing and it is horrible to me at the minute! She is capable of falling asleep without the boob as she falls asleep in the car or at my mum's when she looks after her but at bedtime after she finished her bottl(she's started accepting a bottle a few months ago she had always refused when she was tiny and I expressed milk if I had to go out!) she just wants b/feeding to go to sleep. Any tips on how to recondition her toddler brain?!! I know I sound horrible but I honestly cannot bear it at the moment.

Edited by shelley, 10 February 2015 - 01:15 PM.

ME 35 DH 55 DD1 31.08.13 DD2 19.08.15

#2 Dipsy

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 03:02 PM

I find breastfeeding incredibly painful while pregnant too, so understand completely!

 

Could you do something to radically change routine? I went on holiday with one of mine and they forgot to ask for milk and we broke the habit that way.


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#3 shelley

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 05:39 PM

Thank you for reply yeah I'm thinking when DH is off work soon he could try and settle her on a nighttime or something. If my milk dries up do you think she would get fed up and stop?
ME 35 DH 55 DD1 31.08.13 DD2 19.08.15

#4 Mummyminister

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 05:53 PM

Depends if it's the milk or the 'something to suckle and chew' she likes. Can you find her something she likes to chew on? Teething ring type toy?

me 45, dd 12, adult adopted daughters dR and dS, cats Casper and Fern. 

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#5 shelley

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 06:58 PM

Tried everything like that she's not interested! She isn't after the milk at all it is just a suckling / comfort thing. Thank you for the suggestions!
ME 35 DH 55 DD1 31.08.13 DD2 19.08.15

#6 EnglishMuffin

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 07:07 PM

I'd like to say - Well done for sticking at it for so long! I'm no expert on breast feeding, but as one mother to another, I'd say - if you're not happy with her at the breast any longer, I think with 17 months under your belt, you're allowed to say no, and help her find another way to soothe herself. You can still give lots of cuddles and love!


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#7 Dipsy

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 09:01 PM

:ninja: Bribe her. If you are good and go to bed without .... you can have ..... in the morning. Same as for getting rid of a dummy. It cost me a couple of Barney videos to get rid of dummies, but I'm sure something like chocolate buttons or ducks for the bath or something would work.


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#8 BecD

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 09:09 PM

When My friends was weaning her 2yo she wore a swimming costume as it made it difficult for her dd to get to her books! When I weaned ds at 9 months (medical reasons) I had to get Dh to do a few nights and then I came back well covered. It happened much more easily than I was fearing!

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#9 shelley

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 10:22 PM

Thanks everyone for the great suggestions. Guess there's no quick fix and I'll have a few difficult nights and tears trying new things. I've certainly learned a few things that I'll do so differently with baby number 2. Dummy. *cough*
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#10 Mummyminister

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 10:24 PM

No 2 will almost certainly be totally different! May be like my dd - not interested in a dummy and voluntarily gave up bf at 6 months!!!! :) they are all so different. But praying for you as you make the transition.

me 45, dd 12, adult adopted daughters dR and dS, cats Casper and Fern. 

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Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength

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#11 erica

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 10:26 PM

I was determined no 2 ( and 3) would have dummies - they were having none of it!!!!

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#12 newbiemum

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 11:55 PM

No, ds1 was the only one who took a dummy. Ds3 found his thumb, ds2 had a rabbit and ds4 still uses me....
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#13 newbiemum

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Posted 10 February 2015 - 11:57 PM

I guess it's worth considering, did you want to tandem feed? If you could get past this awful bit and not feel like this, would you want to continue? There are some bits in the womanly art of breast feeding, also a book about tandem feeding - you la leche league might also be a good contact as a lot of mums there will have experienced this and may have some good tips on how they got through...
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#14 Dipsy

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Posted 11 February 2015 - 07:43 AM

Although those of mine who have wanted to tandem feed, have seemed able to take it back up once the baby was born, so you don't necessarily have to carry on whilst pregnant.


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Mum to : dd1 19yrs ds1 17 yrs dd2 14 yrs ds2 12 yrs dd3 10yrs ds3 8 yrs dd4 6 yrs ds4 4yrs dd5 2 yrs, dd6 brand new! 

 

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#15 hepzibah

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Posted 11 February 2015 - 08:23 AM

When My friends was weaning her 2yo she wore a swimming costume as it made it difficult for her dd to get to her books! When I weaned ds at 9 months (medical reasons) I had to get Dh to do a few nights and then I came back well covered. It happened much more easily than I was fearing!

 

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#16 Ju

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Posted 11 February 2015 - 10:48 AM

Ds will only ultimately settle with me, not anything else. Dd had/has a stuffed cat and her right thumb.

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#17 shelley

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Posted 11 February 2015 - 09:23 PM

Not sure about tandem feeding yet just want her off the boob NOW!! If she feels upset and wants to feed again when she sees new baby feeding that will be fine but if she's not bothered that's also fine!
ME 35 DH 55 DD1 31.08.13 DD2 19.08.15

#18 Dipsy

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Posted 12 February 2015 - 01:09 PM

No need to decide now! Some of mine have just wanted to have a go and not asked a second time, a few have enjoyed a bedtime feed for a while. One of them smelt when my colostrum came in a few weeks before bubs was born and started again then!


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Mum to : dd1 19yrs ds1 17 yrs dd2 14 yrs ds2 12 yrs dd3 10yrs ds3 8 yrs dd4 6 yrs ds4 4yrs dd5 2 yrs, dd6 brand new! 

 

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#19 Blessed By His Grace

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Posted 13 February 2015 - 04:12 AM

Would that mean the new baby wouldn't get the colostrum?
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#20 Dipsy

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Posted 13 February 2015 - 01:25 PM

No, there was gallons of colostrum for both of them! The milk didn't come in until the normal day 3.

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Mum to : dd1 19yrs ds1 17 yrs dd2 14 yrs ds2 12 yrs dd3 10yrs ds3 8 yrs dd4 6 yrs ds4 4yrs dd5 2 yrs, dd6 brand new! 

 

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